38

I went a tad bit cray cray this last week, and it was no bueno. On Sunday (the first day of my 38th week) I had just decided that I was done. I hurt, I hadn't slept in a few weeks and, AND, I got my first stomach stretch mark. While other stretch marks have appeared, I was really hoping to avoid the stomach ones. Well, why the heck would I be that lucky. I think I've gained a new one every day. Good thing my bikinis are packed deep in the depths of who knows where. Just kidding, I know exactly where because I did such a good job nesting.

Speaking of nesting, I got home Wednesday evening, put a little laundry away and realized that all of my house projects and cleanings are DONE. I guess 38 will be known as the week of "dones". I didn't even know what to do with myself, so I put my feet up and watched TV with zero guilt. I think that was the universe giving me a little bit of a break, it calmed me down and I'm not as in big of a hurry to get her here. I know that sounds kind of mean, but really, I need some guilt free relaxing time in a bad bad way and I plan on doing that for the next week or two. It's maybe the best feeling. BEST.

My doctors appointment this week lasted about 10 minutes.

Weight: Normal
BP: Fine.
Elle's heart beat: award winning according to the doctor
Effaced: 40%
Dialated: 0.5 cm STILL

She's so comfy in there it's not even funny, but because I'm officially ready for her arrival I'm not going to complain about kicking back and relaxing.

We were lucky enough to have j.rue's pops in town for a couple of days and did a little bit of early celebrating. Sadly, he had to leave before his big 5-0 (which was yesterday), but who hates celebrating birthdays early? Not us.

J.rue and I both had Friday off so we spent most of that day birthday shopping, with some baby errands mixed in of course, because really, there's no escaping it. So. Much. Baby. Stuff. I also decided that I would be inducing labor that weekend so we walked. a lot. I probably would have tried to walk to Park City if he would have let me. It did snow a tiny bit in PC while we were shopping and that was kind of fun. We're definitely not ready for a white world yet, but it was a fun interjection. So Friday we walked, and walked, and walked, and ate some spicy food.

^^ how's my pregnant face doin'^^

Saturday we went on a hike that about killed me. Since it about killed me, there are no pictures just because it was not pretty. It was however, the perfect day for a hike and it was gorgeous up in the mountains. Later that evening we went with the fam to Black Island Farms for some pumpkin pickin, hay riding, corn maze, sliding fun. I was hoping the slides and hay rides would tick Ellie off enough to come. So, I put myself through this:

^^let's call this gem "Mother of the Year" shall we?^^

But alas, here we are, Wednesday, October 2nd, when I thought she would be here and she's not. So I'll continue my walkin', but probably call it quits on all of the other "methods" out there. I'm just too tired. BTW, I have a pregnancy count-down at the bottom of my blog. We just have 5 days left. FIVE. It's gone by so quickly. If only I had some sort of guarantee it wouldn't be longer than 5 days.

le sigh.

37

Week 37 shall go down in the books as the week of no sleep. It's officially began, for real. I thought that it had begun a few weeks ago, but I really didn't know what was ahead. I'm actually functioning a hundred times better than I thought possible, but it still doesn't mean it's pretty. I've banned j.rue from asking me how I slept until she gets here because no one wants to rub salt in the wound and start the morning off on a negative note. Sadly, I'm one of those that takes about 30 minutes to become pleasant to be around when I have to wake up before 7. I need to work on that.

The doctors appointments was pretty much as unexciting as the weeks before. I tested negative for the strep and I was/am dilated to a whole 0.5 cm and 25% effaced. Obviously, we're not in too big of a hurry, are we Ellie? It's fine, we're not ready yet.

However, I did manage to finish off her room which I now declare my labor of love for this child. Painting over ceiling clouds, I won't do that for just anybody. When I finished it up I made j.rue come down and we just laid on the flood. It was surreal. I think he got a little excited too. I also had my final shower on Saturday, thrown by some lovely ladies in the ward. It was so fun to get together, chat, and eat lots and lots of chocolate. We really and truly did move into the best ward. Speaking of church stuff, did I mention that I got a calling? I'm the Personal Progress Advisor for the Mia Maids, and I'm stoked to be back in young womens. Also, I didn't ever finish my personal progress (sad), so I will most definitely be working on it right along with the girls.

Our little gal is huge, well at least she feels huge, at least 15 lbs. Heaven help me if she is. She's still doing all of her rolls and tumbling and will stick me with an occasional heel. I'm a little worried that she isn't going to be a snuggler because every time I find a limb or point she quickly hides away. We actually have started a hide and seek tradition every night before bed. She's exceptionally good at burying herself so far back that I can't find her. Please bless she's a little more cuddly on the outside. I wonder when she's actually going to choose to come outside? Anytime soon? It doesn't feel like it. Not one bit. COME ONE ELLIE!

While the week was full of sweet things we did loose Jeremy's sweet uncle on Tuesday. He was one of the most generous and kind man that I've ever met and heaven gained a good one. While we mourn his loss their is great comfort that he will be reunited with his sweet wife and we will see him again soon some day. That is one of the reasons why I love this gospel so much. His funeral today and Jeremy was honored to be a pall bearer. He will be so greatly missed.

P.S. It's my hot sexy man candy of a husband's birthday today. He's the big 2-7. Oh how he still makes me swoon.

36

Remember when I wrote a love letter to 34 weeks? Well, I was completely spot on because I really do love that 34 weeks. No aches and pains and the such. I suppose though that I would rather be less than a month out (21 days!) than have no aches and pains. Over the last week my body has also decided that as desperately as it needs sleep, it's not gonna have it. I literally live for Sunday afternoon naps like never before. There's something magical about naps. They're nothing like night time sleeps. At the moment, there really is nothing better than getting home from church, chowing down on some pb&j and than laying down next to j.rue (who is reading or watching football) and taking a nice long nap. Oh yeah, and the puppies are snuggling of course. Really, not many better things right now.

I had a doctors appointment last week (and I'm sure you will notice that this is a common theme over the next few posts) and everything is in tip top shape, including my cervix, which has now "dropped" or done whatever it's supposed to do to warrant progress. First, being checked IS NOT THAT BAD. Maybe it's because I haven't progressed a lick, but not bad. I've seriously had paps hurt worse. Second, I'm debating being checked again this week because this last time totally got my hopes up. I didn't plan on being at a 3 or anything, but nothin, come on.  So, I really don't know if I want to hear that I'm at the same place. But chances are, I'll be checked again because that's the kind of person that I am.

All along I've been guessing that she'll come on October 2nd, well, since I'm the mom, I'm going to change my guess to October 10th. I'm just starting to feel like she is oh so comfy in there, yes because of my last appointment, but like I said, I'm the mom. I've actually been waiting my whole life to use that excuse. HUZZAH! I actually need to go around to family and get official guesses about due dates. We'll probably get weights, lengths, and hair color guesses while we're at it. That'll be a fun memory post.

One of the last projects on my to-do before Ellie gets here list was to get the carpets clean, which we did Saturday morning, at 8 am. Please take my advice, don't get your carpets cleaned at 8 am on a Saturday. Meaning you will be up at 7 moving furniture, meaning if you're 8 months pregnant, your husband will be up at 7 am moving furniture. Not fun. But it's nice to have it done.

I had another shower on Saturday and it was just lovely, this one was thrown by some of my sweet friends from high school. It was so fun to catch up with everyone. Again, I sucked at got about 0 pictures, so I'll be needing those ladies, please send them my way! I really do have the best (and prettiest) friends.

Again, Melinda was kind enough to run a million errands with me that night, and Brookie Jayde even decided to join us for the ride. While we were out to dinner she was asked if she wanted to go shopping or stay home with the daddies. Obviously her mother has trained her right because she yelled "shoppin!" without a moment's hesitation. Oh we love that girl. We spent the rest of the night hitting up Target, Wal-mart and what felt like 15 other places. We were pooped by the time we got home.

The last pregnancy event that went down was another hormonal induced cry session. It's really getting a little ridiculous, these hormones do not take a day off EVER. I was at lunch with j.rue and suggested getting away from a weekend before Ellie got here. Then we started looking through our calendars and realized that the next weekend that would really work would be the weekend of her due date, and while this MIGHT work, it probably won't be I will either a) have a baby or b) be so huge and ready to have a baby that I'll just want to be home in my own bed.

Of course this brought on crazy emotions and tears about how everything is going to change and it'll never be just the two of us again. ever. No more spontaneity (even though we're totally not). I'm just glad that these random emotions that I had no idea I had are manifesting themselves now and now 2 weeks after Ellie gets her. It allows me to deal and allows j.rue to give me really huge hugs which I also need. Mostly, everything is about me now. After a nice long chat, I now am comfortable with the fact that we will still go on dates, he does still love me, and that while things will be different, they will be a better different. This is probably the 10 millionth time he's given me this pep talk. Such the coach. Did I marry a winner or what? 

The below pictures looks like j.rue is the one having the pregnancy induced melt-down when in fact he's basically dying over how good his slice of oreo pizza is. We're so going back next week. Caaarrbsss!

35

I'm getting to the point now where I just want to talk about my current week SO badly because I mean it's way cooler to be 4 weeks away from my due date rather than talk about the week that was 5 weeks away from my due date. But then it takes about 4 seconds to realize that a bunch of stuff did happen in that further away week, thus it needs to be documented, and this one actually did have some stuff go down...

Most importantly, I had two amazing showers. I think they deserve a post of their own though, so hopefully I'll get around to that this week. Ellie was most definitely spoiled with baby goods and I was spoiled with good company. There's not much else that I love more than visiting, well, and eating, so the two of those combined and I was in heaven! I also learned during baby shower #2 that I should no longer be wearing regular t-shirts, which severely limits my wardrobe. I kept having just the littlest part of my stomach show out the bottom. Luckily, this was before the guests arrived, so I added a belly band, thank goodness for those stupid things.

Besides the showers, I'd like to think that I made leaps and bounds in the baby gear department. On Thursday afternoon I discovered Amazon was having a 20% off baby sale, so the crib mattress and accouterments were ordered. I should have a big a mattress box sitting on my porch when I get home. I'm a little excited. Saturday evening, I took Melinda down to SLC to make the long awaited car seat & baby monitor purchase. That one hurt a little more than the mattress purchase, but I hear that won't let you take the baby home from the hospital if you don't have a car seat or something? And then we went to the dreaded Ikea, which really, wasn't that bad because it just wasn't, but it also felt good know that there was NOTHING else that I needed from there. Now begins the glorious 1 year Ikea hiatus. Because seriously. Thank goodness for Melinda, she makes running those types of errands much more bearable, even fun. Our car talks really can't be beat.

Other than that I've just been spending as much time with my brothers as they'll give me. They get so busy and I miss them.

Probably for my husbands sake I should note that BYU beat Texas, so that's exciting for him. Me also because that means I had a happy husband for the duration of the weekend.

I finished up an Ellie's room craft too, but there's enough to that one that I'll do another post as well. Look at me with all of my post line-ups.

Since my last doctor's appointment I've been a little extra worried about keeping track of the little squirt's movements. I worry that she'll get too squished and just decided to take it easy for the last month, but luckily I feel her shifting even more, she know's her mama so well already. It's also starting to sink in more and more to j.rue and I that our little unit will be expanding by 1 whole person in less than a month. Saturday was exactly a month from my due date and it kind of scared me a lot. I really really am bad with change, even the best kinds, like this for example. Sometimes I'll catch us doing something that will be a little more difficult with a little person, and think, oh maybe I'm not ready for this. It's comfy how we are now. Also, I love spending time by myself and I know that's going to come in very limited quantities for basically the rest of my life and I sometimes find myself wishing I could just keep it a little bit longer. I know this all sounds horrible, but it's just how things are in my head. Of course I haven't mentioned the other 99% of the time when I'm sitting and day dreaming about staying home with my baby and oohing and awwing over her for the next forever. I am so excited. The drastic change in lifestyle is just scary. I'm not one of those lucky women who took this as a natural calling from day one. Motherhood is something that I'm going to have to grow into and give myself a lot of patience, leeway, and love along the way. But am I up for the challenge? After almost 8 months, I can honestly say yes. But if you could get inside my head 4 months ago? No, probably not.

Oh, but I love that girl so much already. I almost feel like I already know her. I know we've met before and chosen to be together, so it's only a matter of time that we slip back into our old ways and comforts together with each other.

34

Can I make a prediction? I predict that 34 weeks will be my last uber comfy week. Why? Well, because it's now week 35 and like clockwork my body decided to do lots of un-fun things and then not let me sleep on top of it all. So, this is my official love letter to the last comfy week of pregnancy. We'll call it Ode to Week 34.

Too bad last week was also supa boring as far as pregnancy goes. I had a doctors appointment, the last one where I get to keep my pants on, so that's noteworthy I suppose. I did gain less than 1 lb, but I'm chalking that up to my crazy work schedule and training, oh and that I can eat 2 raisins and be full. It's actually quite annoying considering I've basically given myself a pass for the next 5 weeks to enjoy delicious food. For the most part that doesn't stop me though and I end up just feeling full and well, super full all the time. Sad for all of my insides that now all share a 3 square in radius. I'll head to the doctors office again next week and then every week until Ellie makes her grand appearance. I'm not so excited about those.

I also had another series of mini freak outs because I could not decide on which car seat to get. Could not. I got all pumped because j.rue said we could go to Babies R Us and try out car seats to my hearts desire AFTER the BYU game on Saturday. Sad part: BYU lost. Happy part: I'm pretty sure I found "the one" and I'm going to purchase her sometime this week so I can at least try to sleep easier at night.

I spent a good portion of my Sunday nap time making lists of "finals", the cleaning, purchasing, and projecting that needs to be done. I don't know if it helped or hindered. As far as the cleaning and organizing goes, it should be done by Friday and then we'll just have to maintain. That will be the tricky part honestly, we're bad dishes and laundry maintainers. As far as purchases, I have to make ONE MORE trip to Ikea, much to my chagrin. Just one more and then I plan on staying away for a solid year. That place does things to you, you know, mentally. Because of this last minute trip I won't have Ellie's room completely done by my goal of August 31st, but the only things that aren't done are the pictures up on the wall. I can totally live with that.

As for the child, she's getting big. Apparently she weighs 5 to more than 5 pounds and I can feel it. Everywhere. She's not kicking as much anymore, but rather shifting and making huge waves on my stomach. She gets the hiccups lately and while they're cute no matter what, they almost give me a stomach ache if I'm too hungry. I still wouldn't trade 'em. We've also been experiencing more and more braxton hicks, actually I think in the last week I'm really just starting to experience them. I thought the rock hard stomach that didn't hurt was braxton hicks, but I'm pretty sure the real braxton hicks occur when I actually can't catch my breath and the tightening is happening one the inside instead of the outside. Make sense? It doesn't really to me either. Also, my belly button. It's deep and I'm pretty sure it's not capable of becoming an outie. However, it's starting to pooch out around the edges in it's own special way and I'm pretty sure that it's just going to keep doing that more and more. The only way I can describe it is fluffy. I have a fluffy bellybutton. It's real cute. Cute enough that I will NEVER take a picture of it's cuteness. You're welcome.

Other than that, I did lots of sleeping and ain't no body gonna complain about that!

33

Alas, another week of pregnancy paradise (oxymoron?). But really, this one was neat-o because I could say that we're 6 weeks away from D-day, which is waaaaaay closer than 8 weeks. You guys, we're so close! I know, I'm sure you're in stitches.

This last was was actually quite a bit different from previous weeks because I started training my replacement at work. Thank my lucky stars we get along famously, and at this point I'm more than happy to hand over the reins in the next little while. Training is a little faster paced than I'm used to though and that coupled with the weeks before school has made for long exhausting days. I will be physically tired after meeting with students. Actually, that's been happening since day one, just faster now that my lungs, intestines, and other major organs are all sharing the same 3 inches. So besides training all day every day, I honestly haven't done or noticed much. I actually felt some guild because I didn't spend much time thinking about Ellie or prepping for her arrival. I'm pooped.

However, we did a momentous thing on Sunday...

The crib is now standing! It was actually a whole family affair.

J.rue did 94.7% of the work and direction reading.

Maggie doesn't like change much so she just cowered in the safety of my pasty white pregnant legs.

...and Coop was a little bit sad because he was stuck on the wrong side of the bars with his dad. He doesn't like not getting his way. But he's a cute pouter, isn't he?

Ellie actually participated as well. She is already a very talented prop. She held up multiple sides of the crib while I fumbled with washers, screws, nuts, and the like. Also, my stomach isn't very "round" she always seems to protrude more on one side than the other.

And WAH LAH! the finished product, except that I have zero mattress and zero bedding. I'm not doing a bumper or dust ruffle though, so it's really just sheets and well, I'm not gonna let sheets stress me out.

Also of note for last week is that I went on a serious kitchen scrub down, I even pulled out the fridge and cleaned the crap out of it. FYI, I love cleaning the backsides of fridges. I'd probably even do yours fo free. If you want to talk swapping a bathtub cleaning for a fridge scrubbing, call me. If I can keep going at this crazy nesting pace, out house should be sparkling and de-cluttered by the time Elles decides to grace us with her presence on October 2nd. Yes, I'm still sticking to that birthday.

Other than that, she's growing, I'm growing. I'm slowly starting to sleep less and less and she's starting to practice her tumbling skills more and more. Love it!

Hopefully I'll have a tiny bit more energy next week. 

32

I woke up this morning and decided that I was sick and tired of wearing skirts, so I pulled out a trusty pair of jeans. Yes, the kind with real buttons. Actually, I'm lying, while I am getting sick of all my stretchy clothe,s I really just woke up this weekend and decided that laundry wasn't on the agenda. So, all of my overworn stretchy bottoms are out of commission. Thus the jeans. My last resort. However I'm proud to say that I'm wearing them, buttoned up and sitting down. Are they that comfy? Standing up, they are.

My stomach is getting kind of big. I don't want to let myself think it's that big yet because I still have a lot of growing to do, and when I look at gals at 37+ weeks I know I ain't got nothin' on them. BUT with that being said I think I'm to the point where my un-pregnant self would wonder what my pregnant self would look like naked. Not you pregnant girl, just myself. You see, pre-pregnancy, it kind of blew my mind that large pregnant stomachs could hold themselves up. I was pretty sure it was the elastic waist pants that did all the work. But then I wondered what those pregnant stomachs did naked. I know, I'm so creepy. Once, I almost asked my SIL to let me see her bare stomach, just because I was so curious. I'm sure she totally would have let me, but I'm a wuss and didn't ask. Hey Melinda! And now, I can just check out my own on a daily basis, and it seems to be holding itself up just fine.

This week has been my most favorite week of pregnancy thus far. I'm guessing I might say that almost every week after this too, but up to this point 32 has won my heart. Ellie has been growing a ton, meaning we're sharing tight quarters. Meaning that I can feel her move all.the.time. It's my most favorite part. The movements. They make me so happy I could cry. Feeling her move so much makes me day dream about her 24/7. The daydreams are followed by me being a little sad though because I just want her to be here so bad. So bad. We're to the point where I can tell a limb from a bum or back. I would say head, but it's just laying on my bladder so I feel that in other ways.

And while this has been my most favorite week, it's also been my most uncomfortable. You see, Ellie is a very particular girl. She is at her best when her foot is hooked under my right rib, her bum is situated on my right hip, and her head is, you guessed it, on my bladder. I really don't know how I have a front bump, it should be a totally crooked side bump. She is never front and center. But that's okay, it always makes it easier to find her. Since I know her exact whereabouts always I find myself talking to her more and more. Daily we have the discussion that I think her birthday should be on October 2nd. I'm just hoping she agrees. Not too early, not too late, what's not to love? Oh I just almost can't stand the waiting. Impatient much?

I had another doctors appointment this last week. I'm going in every 2 weeks and that's making the weeks fly by. Thank goodness we don't start the fun checks until 36 weeks. I've gained a solid 20 lbs, have a low blood pressure, and got my Tdap shot, and I'm feeling okay about all of it. Doctors appointments aren't all that exciting, so I'll leave it at that.

Oh, and I got a H-U-G-E project checked off my to-do list, that being cleaning out our scary laundry/storage room. You know, the one that was infested with bees last year. We found maybe 30 more dead bees in canisters, on shelves, in crevices. But it feels oh so good to have that done. This week I'm going for the kitchen, which is also a little scary. Not like the kind where you would walk into my house and call me a barn animal. But you know when you actually take a second to look on your walls and in your cabinets, and the such? Then you think you're a dirty barn animal and something has got to be done. I'm sure I'll be updating next week. Maybe this week, but you know me.

Crib is still not up. I'm shooting for August 31st.

31

Biggest thing about this week: my weekly email updates all (yes I get 3) all told me that if my baby were to be born this week, she would have a 95% chance of living a healthy life. I'm pretty okay with that, especially since she's now made it another week. Other than that, nothing super exciting. I feel like I'm kind of a broken record with symptoms, but I'm hoping I appreciate these next pregnancy?

Sleepiness: So much. But I don't have it as good as the first trimester because while I can still go for a nap at 6 pm, I probably shouldn't because I will be wide awake at 4 am. Still tired though. It makes no sense.

Aches & Pains: Getting more and more frequent. Girl is packin' on the pounds (actually, both of us are, I'm sure) and runnin' out of room. She still adores using my bladder has her pillow and is now long enough to use my right ribs as a foot rest or stirrup, depending on how playful she feels. The bladder, I'm used to. The ribs, not so much. It's a dull tingly pain and I don't like it. But I'm sure she's feeling space deprived as well, so at least we suffer in unity.

Movements: I worry about those kick-counts more and more. I don't actually do them, but I am very aware of how often she moves and so far, has yet to disappoint. During the weekend we were over at J&M's house and Ellie got the hiccups and let her Aunt Melinda participate in the charade. The public can now also witness the rippling of my stomach.  Sometimes this child likes to make a spectacle of herself. Can you blame her though? She is her daddy's daughter.

The Bump: I officially feel huge and loathe the fact that I have 8 more weeks to increase in size. It's hilarious watching my try to get in and out of a bathroom stall, or my car in the parking lot. Small spaces.

On Saturday, my brother Micah went through the temple. It was a little bit of a stressful day because I decided to take it upon myself to go to Ikea and get the crib before hand. That was interesting to say the least. But once we were settled in the temple, everything was wonderful. However, there was a lady sitting next to me during the session and she kept looking at me, or Ellie. She was kinda going nuts and got some soft of sugar high. Being in the temple has a different effect on everyone, I suppose. Anyway, this lady kept looking at me like she wanted to chat, but I wasn't really in the mood. I thought I had totally avoided her, but she found me on my way out of the dressing room and our convo kind of went like this:

Lady: "Is it weird that I know you're having a girl?"
Me: "Kind of." - More bemused than rude.
Lady: "I could feel her feisty spirit and could tell by where she was sitting and bouncing that bla bla bla..."

First, it's not nice to tell someone her child is feisty, even though I know it's true. I just don't want to acknowledge it yet. And second, I don't know, but people that know everything rub me the wrong way. She also hit the nail on the head by saying that she probably doesn't move or kick much for Jeremy, which is true. But still. So she told me to chase her (the baby) around with an ice cube. Of course j.rue wanted to do this, but it did not work. Instead, she retreated up on the right side of my ribs into a painful mound and refused to move. Thanks lady.

Last thing! I did my 3 hour glucose test on Friday and found out that I am diabetes free and have normal glucose levels HALLELUJAH. The drink is thicker and the needles are pokier. Okay the needles really aren't pokier, but they feel that way after 4 blood draws. I'm just glad that I didn't puke. I celebrated the completion of the test with the biggest bread bowl I'd ever lain eyes on filled with the most delicious artery clogging potato soup. Obviously, I have a rebellious streak.

I can't act like I was tough the whole time though. J.rue came and sat with me for the first 2ish hours and thank goodness he did. I held it together pretty well for the most part. We watched some TV, played some games, and just chatted. But after my 2nd blood draw (that hurt like a mother) I couldn't handle the stress anymore. He was getting ready to leave and I totally broke down and cried. Sometimes about a little bit of pain and a lot of stress really don't mix well inside me. I hate crying in public and I didn't even care. So, he stayed with me until right before my 3rd draw, toughened me up along the way, and then kissed me goodbye and told me I'd do great. Oh husbands really are the greatest, aren't they?

Ellie's room has officially turned into a construction zone. Last night I thought it would be a fabulous idea to put the crib together myself. Here's how it turned out:

ugh. The things I get myself into. I think there's a total of 5 pieces. FIVE.

30

Firstly, can I just point out how amazingly consistent I have been with these weekly pregnancy posts? I don't think I've missed a single once since we announced it.

Second, I thought I'd do a comparison photo because those are fun. Sometimes, but maybe not really in this case. First problem is that the 30 week picture is actually 31 weeks, but Oh well, I won't remember in 5 years anyway. Pregnancy brain is a real life thing.  The next problem is that when I'm doing a comparison I've got to learn to do my hair and makeup to at least kind of match. BUT this is a noticeable difference in the abdomen area, yes? 

My random craving of the week is a big fat cup of ice from Sonic. You guys, it makes my mouth water just thinking about it. Could I maybe have an iron deficiency?

This week I finally had my glucose test, a few weeks late, but hey, if I do have GD then that's 2-6 weeks shorter that I have to prick my finger for every meal. The appointment was last Friday and I really am hoping that I just don't hear anything back. Fasting for 3 hours would pretty much be equivalent to chaining me to a treadmill and forcing me to run at speeds of 10 mph for 5 hours. Really. Girls gotta eat regularly. It's kind of funny how there's certain things that EVERYONE warns you about when they find out you're pregnant. I'd say the glucose test is right up there at top 5. It is apparently the most horrible awful gagalicious thing that you will ever ingest. Especially the orange flavor. NEVER GET THE ORANGE FLAVOR. But they're all still gross. So I went in to too excited of course. I was presented with 3 choices: orange, fruit punch or lemon lime. I went with the lemon lime as I was told it was the safest option.

Honestly, it was not that bad. Flat sprite, goes down like a dream (with a tiny bit of after-burn) and you're done. To this day, I'm still thinking the worst part of pre-natal appointments are the "clean catches" you have to do. WHY does no one bring that up? 

Over the past week or so Ellie's started to get hiccups regularly. I think it's the cutest thing in the world and I love it even more because it's about the only time j.rue can feel her moving around. All of her other moments are so fast and fleeting, it's nice for him to be able to catch some. He kind of doesn't like them because he thinks they feel like they hurt. In my mind it shows she's developing normally, and any reassurance is always welcome.

Every day I go and sit in Ellie's room and talk to her. It felt a little weird at first, but I kind of love it now. I hope the room can be her little spot, everyone needs one. If only I knew what she looks like, it would make this whole daydreaming business much easier. The room is so close to being done and I'm so happy with how everything's coming together. Really, most of my decor projects don't go exactly how i'd like them too. This one is even better. We just need to get the pictures up on the wall and the crib up. I set a goal in February to have everything done before September 1st, and I think we're doing pretty well.

p.s. I just got my glucose test results back and I'll be going in for the 3 hour test. YAY! I was 9 points over, so apparently mama needs to cut back on the carbs and sugar. My main appetite sustainers.  Please pray for me. I can handle the drink. I can handle the blood draws. It's the FASTING. I may die, right then and there. Oh it's going to be an interesting two months.

Don't worry. I'll keep meticulous records :)

29

(how cute is my little birthday buddy in her arial wig? oh that girl was meant for lots of hair. I love her to death)

Sorry, not many posts last week, but for good reason. I worked a whole 2 days last week and took Wednesday through Friday off, partly because of my birthday and partly because I just needed a break before we hire someone and the craziness of fall semester starts up! It was lovely to have the time off, I got a ton done and still managed to relax a little more than I probably should have.

Ellie is getting so so big, I can feel it in my gut, literally. I'm starting to get all those aches and pains that everyone refers to during the 3rd trimester. I actually squatted down to grab something and though she might fly right out then and there. It  freaked me out a little bit so I won't be squatting again anytime in the near future, believe you me. She literally feels like she's locked, loaded, and ready to go. Too bad you're not ready to go little miss. She has GOT to stay in there for at least 8 more weeks, if not for herself AT LEAST for her mommas sanity.

Of course the aches and pains come with more and more movement. I love it love it love it. I feel like she's moving almost all the time, which I probably won't love once she's out of me, but oooh I love it right now. She still hasn't made it up to my ribs yet, which is very polite of her. I swear to you I can feel her bouncing her (whatever) on and off my bladder.  My nausea has come back again a little bit, I just have to make sure that I'm always full and there's nothing too tight around my hips. Like today, I'm for sure wearing my maxi skirt right below my chest. It wasn't made for that, but it's the only way I'll be getting through the day. I'm definitely appreciating the full paneled pants more and more.

Last week J.rue and I were watching some Friends and we started the episode where Rachel has her baby. I've always loved this episode, but this time it made me cry, in the good way. Watching stuff like that (even when it's totally dramatized) gets to me. I'm hoping to drop some good one liners while I'm in labor rather than be the total crazy lady, but who knows. I might turn a little crazy.

Basically, everything just got real this week and she's actually coming. We're actually planning real life events with her in them. On Thursday we bought our plane tickets for Hawaii. We decided to give Ellie a little more life experience and my body a little more healing time before heading to any luaus, so we're jetting off January 1st. As we booked our tickets the website asked for our 3 passengers info. They don't take future birth dates (rude), so we made everything up and now have Little Baby Ruesch on our flight itinerary. Ahh! Melinda and I also spent a good chunk of time discussing fall plans, we are so ready for fall, and I'm going to actually have a baby this fall, and Christmas, and for rest of forever. Que excitement and copious amounts of anxiety.

This week I have a glucose test to look forward to. I've been told to choose the lemon lime flavor, so lemon lime it is. Please bless I don't have diabetes, and if I do that I can find some sort of humor in all of it. Poking myself with a needle, for example.

Coming up this week: Birthday festivities and Eagle Scout stuph.

28

If I wanted to sum up 28 weeks into 2 words I could easily do so with ravenous beast. Ugh, it's not even the slightest bit funny, except it is because it's just ridiculous watching my hunger status change from stuffed to starved in .5 seconds. Ask j.rue. Not since high school have I had to get up and get something to eat in the middle of the night. Early Sunday morning I found myself wide awake at 4:15 am, which isn't unusual actually. It's a wonderful time to relive ones bladder. Anyway, I was starving. So, I went to the kitchen, ate a banana, took the small black fur child out for her own potty break and headed back to bed. Also important, not once in my whole entire life have I ever had a hard time going back to sleep in the middle of the night, not a once. Luckily, there's a first time for everything. I tossed and turned, checked instagram (no one was posting, rude), peed (again), and finally gave in and got up after J.rue started quoting scriptures to me. At least one of us deserved to sleep well.

I set up camp in the living room. It's amazing all that you can get done in the wee hours of the morning. I managed to run the dishwasher, sweep, eat my divine panda left overs and watch 90% of Jingle All the Way. Something about Christmas movies in July just gets me, love it. I decided to give sleep another go just as it was getting light outside, about 6:20. The bad part about insomnia? 9 am church. Here's to hoping this doesn't become a regular thing, especially during the week. My awakeness could also have something to do with the fact that I took a 3 hour nap earlier that afternoon. Going to 10:30 am baby showers and stuffing your face with delicious brunch can be hard work. Ya know what I mean?

I had my last ultrasound on Thursday. She's still a girl and her head was literally resting on my bladder. I do not over exaggerate the bathroom trips folks, we've been having this battle since week 12. I just hope she's fine to stay put right there for another 10 weeks or so. My bladder can handle it as long as I always know where the nearest bathroom is. If you'd ever like a guide of the cleanest most accessible bathrooms from Ogden to SLC, you let me know.

Saturday night we finished painting Ellie's ceiling and we finally moved everything back into her room, and when I say everything I mean her changing table (with a million things stacked on it), pouf, and dresser. No crib yet. I did notice that my her closet is jam packed with stuff that I basically have no where else to put so I plan on using one of my days off this week to sort through everything and get creative with little to no storage options. Oh the joys of tiny old houses with almost zero storage and seriously lacking closet space. Maybe I just have too many shoes? I don't know. I still plan on sharing the closet, but I don't even think we could fit a single diaper in there right now. 

Other than the closet issue I'm very pleased with how her room is coming together. A little girlier than I was planning, but I don't know how avoidable that issue was. I found the final crowning jewel to her dresser knobs with the help of my very patient friend Lindsey. It's surprisingly difficult to choose between foxes and stripes (we went with the stripes) Really all we have left to do is finish the curtains, hang the pictures add some storage bins and a crib and we're golden. Eh, that actually still sounds like a lot. It will probably take me until October, but, what can ya do? It almost makes me too anxious for her to get here, so I might need to slow things down.

p.s. my birthday week is in full swing and I'm being treated to a most delicious lunch by the above patient friend Lindsey. We're basically drooling. Oh and I need to give myself a good eyebrow was today too.

p.p.s Brickyard Buffalo has about a million things up today that you're probably going to want. Just a heads up (no they're not paying me to say that).

27

I've always been a little bit confused as to when the 2nd trimester ends. I've seen girls claim the 3rd at 27 & 28 weeks. I've found that when I push things back rather than up everything tends to move at a faster pace, so I didn't claim the 3rd until this week, and you know what? It's a glorious feeling.

Quite a few things went down during week 27 and it was a delicious one. The most exciting and important one is that one of my baby brothers opened his mission call on Saturday! He has been hoping with all of his heart that he went foreign and Spanish speaking. At first he claimed that he wouldn't go if his criteria wasn't met exactly, but eventually his sweet soul softened up and he knew that he would go wherever he was needed.

Saturday evening everyone and their dog (literally, we had 5 dogs terrorizing the house) gathered in our basement to watch him open his call. I always worry when pre-missionaries open their letters in front of lots of people because what if they're disappointed and just can't hide it. It's okay to be disappointed, for at least a second. I mean, I wouldn't have looked forward to a mission call to Iowa personally. But, Micah was brave and literally invited everyone he knew.  I was hoping and praying that 1) he would be excited about his assignment and 2) he would be here when Elles was born.

Well, I got both of my wishes. Micah will be speaking the espanol in Mexico (Acapulco is included in his mission -- we are SO going to pick him up) and he'll get to know Ellie a whole 2-3 weeks before he jets off. I couldn't contain my squeals and tears. I was one happy sister. He acts tough, but has the cutest little soft spot that I know she'll fit right into. My brother have a (super rude) running joke about how I'm telling everyone that I'm pregnant just so I can get chub. Micah said he wouldn't stop until he felt her kick. It took at good 30 minutes of coaxing, but she finally obliged. It was sweet. 

We're so proud of Micah and the decisions that he's made. He'll make a wonderful (albeit stubborn) missionary.

We'll also be counting this pic as my 27 week picture. Looking straight down, it doesn't seem like I'm that big. I'm nervous that I still have such a long way to go. I'm going to look like the good year blimp between this growing baby and my marvelous swelling abilities. Ah, such is life, right?

As far as the rest of the pregnancy, I feel so lucky. Everything is going swimmingly. I'm sleeping like a baby and have an amazing talent at not actually waking up when I have to pee. It's one of those hidden talents I suppose. I will not lie though, the high temperatures and humidity is kicking my tail, especially the humidity. It's basically a double whammy of bucket loads of sweat and horrible awful smells in small enclosed spaces. We left our dogs in the car (in the evening, calm down) only to come back to a hot box reeking of doggy breath, and not the cute puppy kind.

Ellie and I have a new game where I'll shine my phone flash light on my stomach and she'll kick at it. I find it completely amusing, her for only about 45 seconds. I'm just glad she's not all the way blind. She's getting huge, I can feel it in my bones literally. She doesn't hurt  or wake me up at night, but if I sit for too long she'll make my right ribs go numb. 

Is it weird that I wonder whose pregnant or will be pregnant with my daughter's best friends? It is weird. I know it. I'm just hoping that they're mamas that I can be friends with too. That would just make life a little more fun. I'm also jonesing to know what she looks like in a bad way. It's a pretty safe bet to say that she'll be blonde and blue eyed, but there's just too many variations that I just can't quite sit still. 

I was going to add more to this post, but that would make it ridiculously long, so I'll write another one tomorrow. I'll just leave you with this adorable little apple of my eye. Ellie is so lucky to have her as a cousin.

26

I already gave kind of an update last Friday, BUT just to recap: Ellie bean attended her first fireworks show and decided that she loves them. I hope I don't have one of those kids whose scared of fireworks, that would be interesting. We're both continuing to grow at a ridiculously fast pace, my full paneled shorts are now starting to fit better, which is a good and bad thing. I told j.rue that I was tired of stretchy clothes. Everything that I wear has some sort of stretch to it. He pointed out that during the summer I wear stretchy clothes all the time anyway, boys just don't understand anything. It's the fact that I HAVE TO wear stretchy clothes, at least if I want to avoid passing out from the heat. I miss buttons.

Also, I have a count down all the way at the bottom of my blog, just for my own sanity and I was going to post at 100 days, but guess what? We're already down to 91! So, I guess it's a good thing that I don't peek at it every day, because little surprises like that make the waiting game a little more fun.

There was a doctors appointment last week, and we had a strong heartbeat and you better believe I'm assuming she weighs a whole 2 lbs, because I subtracted that from my total weight gain. You know, because she'll be coming out and all, I'm not going to worry about those extra pounds that I won't have to Zumba off. They measured my stomach from top to bottom and I was right on target at 27 cm. Does anyone else find that crazy that the cm coincide with how many weeks along you are? I just don't get it, but I like it.

I was looking over my calendar and at my remaining doctors appointments and such and got this weird feeling that everything is going to come so quickly/slowly. It's a dumb and confusing feeling. I have 13 weeks left and getting through the first 13 weeks and then the second 13 weeks seemed to take FOR EV ER. It actually gave me a little bit of anxiety. To top that end of it off I started looking at all the week by week udpates on thebump.com and realized how much more growing the two of us have to do in that amount of time. I'm going to be HUGE and it looks very uncomfortable. On the other hand, I'm at 27 weeks ALREADY and I still cannot fathom that I get a baby out of all of this. Then I start thinking about how hard breast feeding will be, and how much I won't be sleeping, and how I won't be working at the U anymore and it completely overwhelms me to the point that I could cry (I may be a little teary right now). How in the heck am I supposed to prepare for all of that 3 short months?! It seems like so many women take to this new mom thing like ducks to water, and maybe I won't be as unnatural at it as I thought, but I know it won't be easy.

With all of that on the table, I really am excited, SO excited for everything else that comes with it. It just needs to come faster/slower.

We finished off week 26 with a trip to the farmers market in SLC and Seven Peaks. I had never been before and fell in love instantly. The weather was perfectly over-cast and we went early enough to get decent parking. The boys happily took Brooklyn to play at the park while we meandered through all of the booths. I left with a bag of cherries (that I almost forgot to pay for), a cookie, and some strawberry lemonade that would make your toes curl.

We finished off the morning at the pool and left right as the sun was becoming way too hot and bright of my pasty skin. The rest of the day was spent relaxing, eating, and watching LOST. Aren't those just the best Saturdays?

25

Welcome to Monday my friends, and also the 1st of July. Pretty much my most favorite month (birthday season for you newbies). Sigh. I really so love everything about this month. Two paid work holidays, fireworks, swimming, bbqs, birthdays, the works. HOWEVER, we all know that I'm a complainer, so how about we start now, mmmk? Also, I have seriously so pictures because I want to use them all for my post tomorrow, so sorry about that. Lots of words today. I was going to post the picture that Baby Center sent me this week, but it's naked and all that exciting so...this is all I got. Oh and maybe a really ugly picture of my dessert Thursday? Why not, but man sakes alive I've got to start getting more pictures.

Ok so I was kidding about the complaining, but not really. It just happens that I'm starting to get to my uncomfortable phase of pregnancy, which I'm guessing is going to become more and more comical as we progress through the days of July that refuse to go below 100 degrees. It just has to be recorded. Usually, I don't mind the heat too bad, but I'm a wuss past 92 degrees, and so are my sausage toes. My body is still champing this pregnancy, it's just starting to slow down a bit. If I'm outside in the heat, it's all I can do to crouch in any splash of shade I can get and sit there like a melted puddle. Even in nice A/Ced rooms I'm slowing down. Exercising has been restricted (just by me) to 45 minutes or less and walking up the stairs...well that's just avoided at all costs. Really, to simplify, sitting, sleeping, and standing are kind of hard work. I can't do any of the 3 for too long.

On Friday I had a tiny freak out. I had some weird cramping pains and didn't feel very much movement. I called my nurse and she kindly listened to my slight hysterics and gave me no straight answers. I was not pleased. After a crying fit and other embarrassing shows of emotion (to j.rue) I finally was able to reason with myself. I realized later that I usually spend the hours between 7-5 sitting in some capacity making it more than easy to feel kicks. When I'm moving around I just don't notice things as often. Also, it was hot and I was running errands, and cleaning, and packing, and hauling stuff out to the car. I'm sure little miss Ellie wasn't super thrilled about being knocked around like that for hours. Oh the fights we shall have when she's out of the womb, I really can't wait.

I really truly do want to take bump pictures, but every time I think about it I'm either a) in my pj sleep shirt that is much too short and much too tight (I don't curr) or b) have chosen to not wear a speck of makeup and I'm sorry, but I just won't do that to you. But I'm really really really going to shoot for this week. We've gotta get some pictoral proof because I actually look pregnant now.

Speaking of looking pregnant, those kicks I love so much, are just getting better. If I can get myself to stay up past 10 we play this game we she kicks and I push back and then she kicks again and so fourth. She'll play we me for about 10 minutes and I revel in every second. It's our best conversations in our most secret language. I can pretty much tell how her day went by her ripples and kicks. Most days I'd say she a little grouchy, just like her momma. I also find slight joy in putting books and ipads and such on my stomach and watching them bounce around as she kicks. She's very particular as to what we stack on her. Being able to see kicks on the outside blows my mind.

According to Baby Center she's a hefty 1 2/3 lbs, which I shall graciously be subtracting off of my weight gain this Wednesday. She's still furry and is getting nice and chubby for me (please have large cheeks). I only have 2 more weeks in the 2nd trimester and I am so not ready to graduate the 3rd yet. It's flying by oh so quickly. I don't even know where my days go anymore. This Saturday I'm hoping and praying that I can get her room painted. The dag nabbed bed is still in there, so we'll also have to vacate that. BUT is is pretty much a holiday weekend (I have to work Friday, boo) so sometimes we're better at doing fun things rather than doing productive things. But cest la vie and carpe diem and such, right?

Sneak peek for tomorrow:

24

Will I ever get over the fact that I title my posts one number and then shout hooray! hooray! I'm (insert one number higher than title's number) this week! ?? I really don't think so. Oh and just in case you're just a little bit confused like my brain tends to be, I am 25 weeks HUZZAH! You know, and all that. Being pregnant is starting to feel like not being pregnant, in that I have accepted my new weird body and am just going with it, like normal. It's nice to be at peace with my body again, especially after 6 months of unrest.

I think we've finally for real settled on a name and I really am going to tell you it tomorrow (even though almost everyone on the planet knows it already), because, of course, it has to make it's official blog debut for me to be taken seriously, am I right? Also, please keep in mind that I change my mind almost daily, so when she pops out and I write a post saying something along the lines of "We're proud to announce the arrival of Genesis Geneva Ruesch" please don't point out that 3 months ago I said her name would be [insert name here] and that you liked that much better because honestly, you'll hurt my feelings. BAD...and we all know that I'm not that consistent to begin with.

All of last week I've had a ton of pregnancy related thoughts bouncing around in my head. Unfortunately, my fingers can't articulate those words and thus less posting. It's very exciting things about staying at home and quitting jobs and hormones and the sort. I know exactly what I want to say, I just don't know how to type it. I've written it and deleted it about 10 times. So you may or may not know my reasoning behind quitting my job after she gets here. I really want it to happen, but I'm just not sure.

As far as the actual pregnancy is going, I'm feeling pretty dang great. b.rue is kicking up a storm. She's still scared of the dark abyss that is my actual middle abdomen. She still prefers to nestle deep down south, unless I mess with her too much. In that case she shacks up diagonally against my right hip bone and down onto my bladder. She does not like to be told what to do. It's fine. Whatever. My emails tell me she weighs about 1.5-2 lbs, meaning that I will be subtracting that from my total weight gain.

Today, I found out that I still cannot handle caffeine like a champ and that it makes my thoughts run 2000 mph and my hands jittery. To make things more fun for yourself you could read this post like I'm talking in my quickest fast voice. It will make it like I'm reading it directly to you. I also know that I'm an awful mother for subjecting my unborn child to caffeine, but honestly I've had it a total of 4 times while pregnant. Fingers crossed she'll make it through. Oh, and my ankles have been a little more forgiving and haven't swelled up on me as much as they were last week.

I had someone ask about b.rue's room and if it's done or not. I had a slight panic attack because honestly, I haven't done a single thing. I'm hoping this weekend of next we'll get the queen bed out of there (I'm pretty sure I've been hoping for that for the last 5 weekends, but to no avail.) and I can begin painting. I picked out a paint sample, slapped some up on the wall as a tester, and approved. It's going to be so fun painting a super light color over over resident circus stripes. Other than that I'm shooting for August, maybe September. Babies don't need 100% completed rooms, right?

I'm thinking 2 more things and then we'll close for the day. First, I'm reading this parenting book that I'm totally enamored with, it's called "Bringing Up Bebe". I've never really loved the idea of parenting books because they overwhelm me and make me feel like an inadequate parent, and I'm not even a parent yet! But I love everything about this book so far and plan on purchasing my own copy and making it my baby bible. I love it that much.

Two, I'm really bad at writing posts that are relevant to the attached pictures. A couple of the pictures that I have included are from Friday night. The other is of my brother is his ugly- a henna tats that he let his little girlfriends draw all over him. Our friends, Scott and Mary, had a bunch of our friends over for dinner and a hang out. Basically our favorite thing to do on the weekend. We don't see these people and their cute kids nearly enough. The best part though? We found out Scott and Mary are expecting a little beginning of January! We couldn't be more excited for them!

23

Week 23 was a good one. It was almost extra nice because I had a few people ask me how far along I was and I couldn't quite remember. Come to find out, I was thinking 22 weeks, when I was actually 23, and am now 24, it makes the waiting a little less agonizing. I've been feeling more tired than I had in the last few weeks, but I swear to you it's because she's going to a gargantuan growth spurt. The week before I hadn't felt a sing movement above my hip bones, how's that for a low rider? Then lo, and behold, she finally started to feel a little cramped and has moved north. As I type this she's doing her morning step aerobics on my right side, just around my belly button. It's her way of greeting the day. Last night if I pushed hard enough (hopefully that's not bad?) I could actually feel where she was, and not just kind of, but some kind of bum/head/elbow/knee. I loved it and I'm pretty sure she didn't. The more I poked and prodded, the more she migrated to my right hip bone, and that doesn't feel so great. We have a feisty one on our hands. Other than that little disagreement, we're golden.

Over the past few weeks I'm also finding myself getting bored out of my mind. J.rue has been working late and I get an hour of interrupted reading time on le bus, so once I get home I don't totally feel the need to relax. I need to be busy in a bad way, and I think j.rue agrees. I'm a little pathetic when he gets home, as in clingy and needy, which honestly honestly honestly, is not like me at all. The poor boy needs some unwinding time, and I have not been obliging. So, for his sake and mine I've started a list of house projects that need to get done and I got a small part-time job with a friends company this weekend that I'll be starting soon. Thank the stars above.

On Saturday we went mini golfing and snow cone eating with our friends, Jake and Heidi, and their baby (my baby's future, bf) Holden. He's just the cutest little squirt. I lost terribly and horribly at the golf, of course. Jake and Heidi schooled both of us, badly. So, being the losers we bought the winners some shaved ice and all was well. After they came over to our house and the boys did what they do best: xbox and the girls (and Holden) just chatted. Heidi is one of those friends that I could talk to for about a million hours. We're so alike, even in looks. Throughout our first year up at the U people were constantly asking if we were sisters. Technically, I say we are. Just because. Soul sistas, ya know?

See? Just the cutest! On Sunday J.rue took a stab at his new calling at church, we'll just say it involves 5 year olds and boogers. Later that evening we went up to eat at my grandparents. My grandma made her signature meal, pot roast, potatoes, and about 1,000 different kinds of veggies from her garden. We were all pleasantly stuffed for rest of the evening. Apprently, there was also some important basketball game on last night that the boys just had to watch. So after dinner was cleaned up and desserts were dishes everyone migrated downstairs to watch the game. My grandma and I opted to watch a PBS murder mystery upstairs instead, much more entertaining. I really am blessed with some of the most amazing grandparents, especially my grandma. Those little moments that we get, just the two of us, are treasured and remind me just how much I am loved.

We did have quite to event last night after we got home, but I think that's a blog post in and of itself, so I'll save it for another day. Let's just say we're prepping for some babies over at Ruesch Manor.