SOMETIMES YOU JUST NEED TO WRITE

why this photo? because i have absolutely nothing else for you right now, but every good blog post has a picture, you know?

...and for me that sometimes just happens to be right now. in the middle of the day. at 10:48 am on a Tuesday. I miss blogging every day. I loved the outlet and the release and the recording of my somewhat mundane, but oh so beautiful life. So, I am going to start writing again. Maybe every day. I haven't quite made that executive decision yet.

Want to know something silly? Since I got a real bonafide camera with more than 6 megapixels, aka my phone, I've shyed away from posting pictures. I got this unruly thought in my head that since I had an actual camera I had to take actual good pictures. That's not true right? That would also mean planning in advance and loading my photos onto my reeeaaally slow and ancient, but still beloved, mac (mac lovah fo' life!). I'm not good at that, planning posts in advance. I kind of like to fly by the seat of my pants, but just barely. and just with my blog. because it's just mine.

you're in luck! i've found another photo to spice up this post. it's my absolute most favorite candy store. and I cannot CANNOT leave without at least $10 worth of candy. it would be a sin again nature.

The other reason I stopped blogging every day? I got intimidated. I was worried that people thought what I was writing about was pointless and dumb. Which, it actually is most of the time, not to me, but maybe to you? But now I'm thinking, sad, why can't I just write about whatever I want and own it? Why am I worried that someone in Atlanta that I've never met (or someone Kaysville who I love) doesn't approve of my thoughts or opinions? And then I was like, I'm okay with it, and then I was. Well am. Yes I am okay with it. One of my most favorite things about reading a blog is going back to their beginnings and watching them evolve as a person, writer, whatever they end up being. I am one of those creepers that start from the beginning, and I LOVE IT.

Not that I expect anyone to start my blog from the beginning. Quite frankly, frank, I would be kind of embarrassed if you did. It's fine though, because I want to be able to look back and see how I've evolved for myself. I love seeing that I've changed and evolved, just to make sure that I'm not becoming stagnant. Stagnant, I think that's the right use for the word? But I don't know? I feel like it means smelly and if I didn't change I think that would be the equivalent of not changing my underpants (which i DO, sometimes multiple times a day) which would get smelly, which I do not ever want to be. I would rather face my fears of change than be a pair of smelly underpants. How boring a life that would be!

Also, I'm not a very feely person in real life, meaning that I don't much like to talk about how I'm feeling. I'm like a man in that way. Such a man. You can talk and talk and talk about your fears, worries, and regrets and I'll be right there with you, holding your kleenex box or rooting you on, but there's something about sharing my own vulnerability that makes my forehead crinkle and make me want to cover my face in my hair (melinda, I'm pretty sure you'll be the only person that gets that). So, blogging is healthy for me. Obv I'm not going to tell you awkward things like if I ever poop my pants or how I feel about our nation's president, because 1. I never plan on pooping my pants and 2. I do not suspect that my opinions will ever, single-handedly getting someone to the white house. ever.

If my ramblings make your blood boil, you can stop reading, for realsies. I'll probably never know. And I do plan on still writing about things that make my blood boil, but in a happy way. an obsessive, excited, dreamy sort of way, like this for example.

AHHH it feels good to be regular again.

stop it. now.

Plus, I've missed important recordings like my birthday, and my first ever girls trip, which just happened to be quite the success. Now, to start uploading my photos. right? right? yes.

I love blogging.

...but I also love living, and summer, and face-to-face interactions. I don't know if any of you know this, but I'm also a little high strung, and for whatever reason, I put myself up to a "I MUST BLOG EVERY DAY" standard, and I started dreading blogging. I also started writing about dumb things that you and I really couldn't give a darn about. 

So, I'm trying something new, not blogging every day. And can I just tell you that it feels kind of freeing, like running around naked without a care in the world and shouting "CARPE DIEM" freeing. I want to be more picky about the things I write about. I want to feel inspired, and once that happens I will be excited to share it with you.

 As my family journal, I will continue to record awesome adventures and happenings on a regular basis. I actually have one in queue, I just have to finish it, but besides that, notta lotta going around at Ruesch Manor. I don't want to force this, because I don't want to look back and thing "I wrote that and people read it, how embarassing" red face thing to happen. Because, it has. A few too many times. I am looking forward to write about mini rue kidletts in the future. I can only imagine that they will be a tad bit more interesting/cute/cuddly/photogenic/bald than j.rue or I could ever hope to be, which might call for a daily posting again. Yes, I plan on being one of those mothers. It makes me giddy with excitement!

I'm sure I'll also write about things that catch my eye from time to time, because let's be honest, when I'm smitten with something I just love to shout it from the roof tops.

A new camera should be joining the mix in about a week (squeeeeeeal!!!!!!!!!!) and I'm hoping to capture a little more of the sweet moments in our life, I'll probably share those too. Just once in a while.

But always know that when I start writing a "short" post, that it will end up being way more words than I think I'm capable of. Like this one. So, I hope you like reading more words than you like looking at pictures, because I just can't help the words from fingers thing. There are so many fantastic tangents to go off on, I mean, you know what I mean?

I love you.

Tuesday Thoughts

I was going to write about our trip up to the cabin this weekend, but then I saw Melinda's post and decided I liked her pictures better. So mosey on over there is you want to read about our weekend. It was a good one.

Besides our weekend adventure there haven't been too many goings on over at Ruesch Manor. I've been spring cleaning my tush off, but do you really want to hear about that? Naw. Since the weathers been warm, we're spending every spare second we can outside. We've even turned on the sprinklers for Mr. Coop to attack. I think I most definitely need to post a video of that soon.

Last night, around 9:45, I decided that I wanted to go on a walk. How's that for being a spontaneous granny pants? Oh, was it glorious. The smells, the breeze, the company. J.rue insisted on bringing a cup of milk and two pop tarts with him, but after he was done we held hands. The puppies loved it too.

Speaking of puppies, they've been quite rebellious lately. If they don't get an evening walk, they refuse to sleep at night. I'm talking chasing each other around the house at 3:30 am. Barking. J.rue does not take to those kinds of shenanegins kindly. It's no nonsense at our house after the hour of 11. So, I've met the rebellious fur children's demands and there is an evening walk. every day.

A week or so ago, I posted a 4 week 5k training plan to prepare for this race. Guess who hasn't run a stitch? This girl. I confessed this to j.rue and he said he may or may not have to leave me behind. You guys, I would die if he left me. I would be a sad color smattered girl {that would most likely come in last} So, j.rue don't you dare even think about leaving me. Even if you have to drag me by my left arm, we will finish together. Maybe I should go and hit up my arch nemesis, Treadmill, today. But the rowing machine also sounds fun, so maybe not.

Lastly, my cute friend Linds, just dropped off this months required readings. Melinda, I've been given strict orders to pass the top one off to you.